Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Wings for a Wild Heart on the Mountain

This year, I attended Wild Woman Fest 16 in the Beautiful Mountains of New Lebanon, NY. I did not know what to expect. Being a first time attendee, I was a little anxious. I had never been around so many women. The Spirit in the air was of celebration and reunion. It was heart-warming to see the many re-connections of friendships formed over the year from past events. It was also a little intimidating, because I went by myself. Even still, every soul I encountered was so kind…even if maybe a little awkward sometimes. Eventually, things warmed up and I was able to get into the purpose of my being there…to find my symbolic “wings” …the freedom to be, autonomy, independence, and inter-dependence. I was able to slow down and enjoy the moment. I was able to think on my life deeply.

My need for self-reflection led me to miss out on many of the events that I had planned to attend, but my purpose for being there called for me to spend a lot of time alone to think, pray, meditate and deeply connect to my inner-knowing. It was then that the truth came to me. Freedom is a way of thinking and perceiving. It is a state of mind. If I desire to find my “wings,” I would have to understand that it all begins in the mind. This realization opened my awareness tremendously. I know what I have to do to find my wings, and the truth of the matter is that I ALREADY have them! They only need to be exercised, and I haven’t been. Freedom is like developing muscles; it only grows when exercised. As one dear friend once told me, there are many things in life that you have to use or you will lose. Freedom is definitely in that category of things.

Freedom will atrophy much like a muscle if never exercised. Freedom of thought can atrophy when subject to the “good opinion of others” as Dr Wayne Dyer once said. I went to the Mountain to find my wings, and in so doing found the seed of truth that was in my heart all along. I only needed to slow down long enough to connect to inner-guidance, and to access the answers that were already in there. It is both exciting and terrifying, because the path forward may not be well-received by every person in my life. However, I cannot let that stop me. I can no longer ignore the call in my heart. I can no longer ignore the truth of what my soul needs to thrive. Like the wind—freedom calls to my sense of independence and autonomy…beckoning me to spread my wings. The urge to fly reemerges, but not without the need to reclaim the power given away for many years. Wings cannot do what they were born to do, if they are never used…never exercised.

Wings require exercise and to do that requires freedom; freedom of mind, freedom of body, and freedom of spirit. Even within committed relationships, there must be a sense of independence, autonomy, and a deep sense of trust and mutual respect for the individual within the partnership. Without independence, there can be no Interdependence; and without interdependence, all you have is co-dependence. Freedom requires independence, and as such, so do our symbolic wings.

If freedom is a state of mind, then one must understand what it means in order to look through the “lens” of freedom, and use critical thought to discern what a person with “wings” would do in any given situation. This will surely upset the balance in life in many ways, but the inertia from ignoring the soul’s call would be far more unbearable, if ignored.

I went to the Mountain to find my wings, and came back with more than I could ever have bargained for. I am truly grateful...and so the journey continues.